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The Coronalogues
The Coronalogues

Season 1, Episode 4 · 1 year ago

Chapter 4: A Frank Proposal

ABOUT THIS EPISODE

A Frank Proposal


A wedding musician (whose definitely not a criminal) grabs at an opportunity, but plans are scuppered by unforeseen events


Characters 

Ally voiced by Rosco McClelland

Jean voiced by JoJo Sutherland 


Written by Keir McAllister 

 

Music Composed and Performed by Dave Be Mac 


If you have enjoyed this recording please consider making a donation via our PayPal link https://bit.ly/DonateWTS


The chronologus chapter four. A frankproposal. Okay, false. Thing you need to know is I am nota criminal man, I'm not a gang. I'm never killed anybody or dealt drugs, are done anything that's like that. But this is just one thing thatfail my lap and I run with it and no once I went saidI do this thing, that's it, nothing else. Honestly, I'm amusician, sex player. I'm an a waiting band. That's not your lifejob. We did blues covers and more than pop songs, the Harmonica andGillows man. That's what we're called because a part of friends to get marriedand also because I'm original lead singer played the Harmonica, but we had toget at him after to get caught pumping a mother of the bride and adisabled toilet and the father complained to the management. On you guys, justa saying which makes it aim a bout stupid, but it says he's gutalone. Good saying, I don't know. Anyway, I just want to makethat clear from the outset that I'm not a criminal, apart for thisone thing. My father, on the other hand, has funeral people kepton call him a bit of a row, which apparently is a correct terminology forhow you should refer to a dead veellain bastard. I won't like yourman. There's no love lost between having me know after how we treat upmum. Hardly spoke to him the last ten years of his life. Itwas only his funeral that I even got a glimpse of the full extent ofhe's dodgy bast on this all these ridiculous men showed up. Guys were likethree teeth, the new bmwsu vs, all thinking the look like Tony Soprano, when they look more like Swiss Tony Sectarian neck tattoos poking out from underthe shots. We're in sunglasses, despite the fact that it's November and ScotlandToday Lemiteen Vision Man. They were walking their own, bumping and a shit. I remember thinking how stupid and never looked more dangerous. Then at theweek I'm at one end of the pub in this heavy set. Guy Walksup to me and says frank wants to talk to you, and for asecond I think he's talking about himself in the third person, and I juststand there waiting for whatever it is they said at frank wants to see.Then emotions to the other side of the pub and nose as I don't guywith a scar running down one cheek, gold ring on each swollen knuckle,setting on his own, stepping out of whisky glass. I mean I laughedout load, man. It was like something at the bank sleep, orrather the we nap. But the guy, the Guy Wo'd been sent over Messengerboy, he saw me smiling and he said quite softly, well,I wouldn't laugh, he's not funny the way he said it combined, butthat look and he's tooth, email and face made my balls physically retract.Man. I remember goping like they do in cartoons. I think I actuallymade the noise Gulpe, and for a second I thought I thought they justrun away. Too Much whiskey already, man, then I pulled myself toGell and nervously followed the big lump to the table to meet the cuddly FrankFrank. Spot was the voice of a...

...man who sucked whisky through let's cigarettesand gargled gravel. It'd make a good blues singer. I remember thinking itwas easily the most intimidating character I've ever met mine. He was like someonewho only had the patients to watch half of the good feelers, but madea real life style choice based on it anyway. Set Down now exactly underJesus Christ as lamasaid a voice, it would seem like this guy, youare a drink. For some reason interesty. I never understood why I did this, but I corrected them a lie. I said what he said, Aliman, not Alexander. People don't call me Alexander, they call mea lie. Or do they know Alexander? Well, your this is. Dadcalled you fucking Alexander. So I'm going to own on your dead fatherswhere she's on the day of his fucking funeral and call you by your properfucking name. You and grateful the whole prick. Is that all fucking keywith you? Alexander's fame man as quick. Do you know who I am,Alexander? He grows with a threat level of our rot whales whose ballsare gently being squeezed, having a clue chut like someone responding to a questionand university challenge. I'll tell you who I am. I'm the Guy whotells you if it's fine, if I want to call you Badra, thatis fine. If I want to call you shaking MPREC pants, that isalso very fucking Faine, you're not the person in this conversation who decides.Well, things are fine or not. I tell you if things are findor not. What do you understand each other? Fame, I mean,yeah, yeah, we do. Now let's start again. Alexander, firstof all, my condolences. Without that close man, so I understand,but you are still your father's son. This is how this is going togo. I am going to speak, you are going to lessen. WhenI am finished speaking, I will give you an opportunity to respond a sampleyes or no. I yes, you'll hear again from me shortly. Ifno, you and I never met again and you forget this conversation ever happened. Understand, don't speak. Nod your head. I nodded my head.I like your father. You could be a bit of a prick, butthat a few favors for me down the years at our home. He askedme to look out for you. He asked you to look out for me. I realize too late that I've interrupted. Frank stops talking and steers at me. You can just stroked his thigh for a second. I think he'sgoing to punch me in the throat. Sorry, sorry, carry on.Sorry. He asked me to look out for you, so I'm going tooffer you a job. I have a job and gleefully interrupt that some kindof unstoppable more on. There's another horrible pause, pregnant with a violence Iknow he's visualized and inflicting on me. I'm so sorry, I'm just nervousmy stuff, frank frank, but I do have a job. Thank you. You played a trumpet. You'RE A trumpet player. In the way hesays it, it makes it sound like it's the most stupid thing in theworld, like he thinks the trumpet and a Kazoo the same thing. Almostinterrupt them again to tell them it's a saxophone, but he's now still amAdam's apple like he's going to take a bite over it, so I managedto suppress my need to correct them. How much do you make blowing yourmeat trumpet? Imagine you're not in the top one person. I can't buy. If you interrupt me one more time, that will stop being the case.Sorry, sorry, I need someone...

...to do a job, someone whohas no idea who I am, someone not connected to me, someone whotravels around the law, maybe blowed I we trumpet. I need someone likethat to pick something up for me. It will be in a car.Whoever nice persons will drive that car to a place. They will take thebag out the back of that car and go to the address that they willbe given, where they will wait until I come and pick up. Oneday's walk from this, I will give that person three thousand pounds. Couldyou be that person, little trumpet boy, don't speak, just not or shakeyour head. Three grands are normally making two months in the wedding seasonif I'm lucky. It's not something I can morally take an objection to easily. If I'm being honest, if you'd asked me to kill someone for threeGrand I would have consider that I would have been able to go through withit, but it would have taken me a while and give up in thepossibility of other than that kind of money for one day's work. So Iknow I did. Of course I did. Again, I would like to stresslet's does not make me a criminal. A slow sneer spreads across frank's face. You'll hear from me again and again, mack indolences, and hegot up and left. The Messenger benchman. Whatever it was had to be abottle phone. Keep on you keep it charged eclipt any time Drin toleave. The many's back was to me. I let out this involuntary, incredulouslaugh. I'd been stif and the whole thing seemed so silly and stagedwhen I was amused by it, not least because it was half caught.Harry Henchman went back around and stared threateningly at me, immediately made a serious, stoic like face and, satisfied that I was at least a little bitscared of them, it tongued back around and bristly walked out before I hadan opportunity to undermine's menace again. When he was far enough away, Igive forward well laughter and ordered another whiskey. I'll be honest, I kind offorgot all about it because I get gloriously drunk that night. I meanI was a thing. I'm paralytic, beauty man, I fantastic shambles ofalcohol and emotion. Not a grief, you understand. Over Kame the liberation. My father was dead, man, dead, I can stop eating themnow, not not hating them. I don't know that I truly hated them. I felt guilty about not loving them. I suppose there was a deep releasein him not being alive like don't get me wrong, man, I'dn'twanted them to die, but I was undeniably happy. I know it was. That makes me sound horrible, I get it, but you weren't thereon man, you don't know what you did to our family. I don'tlike Gante. Please said the man's dead. For a few hours I was freefrom the shadowy cast over me. At least I was until the hangoverkicked in. Whisky hang overs are the absolute whilst mine last dame, Ihad a whiskey hangover. It took me a year and a half before Icould touch the stuff again. I had to drink run like a winker.Whiskey hangovers all mine. Wasson Jen even I felt that my blood had beenreplaced by a thick, concentrated mix of...

...petrol and pest. It was beingpumped in my body by a boss plastic bag heart. I spent most ofthem all than on my knees. Heaven my got something for the umpteenth timethrough my yellow bail and crusted mouth and nose, my head splitting into Icouldn't even remember my name, let alone my ridiculous layer caking counterway Edinburgh's mostcliche gangster. It wasn't until I found a bomb the phone when I waswashing my trousers that even remembered about knowing the frank's proposal. Took me acouple of moments to recognize and and then I remembered where I got it from. That was two whole days previously. Being a bottle phone, the batteryonly gone down by one bar. That's incredible. It's great be youngs thesewe phones mine. I've been like got a bus straight out my phone,and I mean s four like this could last year, but a month withoutneeding charted anyway. No one had phoned up tasted. But now the fullimplications of what I'd agreed to begin to sinking. I mean, what hadI agreed to? Three grants, that was all I kept thinking. Threethousand pounds to the lover. I pass. I could do that, and Ididn't do that. Two days later I got a message on the phonenumber with held, of course. Here's her it was to go down.I get the address of a car and the glove box of that car.Would be further instructions. I was only to take the bottom of phone withme, no other phone. I was to leave more and phone wherever myallied by. was all pretty straightforward, except the car was in Lover Pool, man. I was not expecting that. I mean it was thinking the carwould be around the city somewhere, maybe quass good the most, NotEngland mine. But I was in it now. What was I got todo? Sorry, mad bastard, frank only do local, not of course. I wasn't three grand man. That's what I kept telling myself, andI was down in my last pennies at that point anyway. Like I barelyhad enough for the train ticket, which was a scandalous fortune, by theway, a foot Spain for less, but I managed to scrape it togetheron a head off the beat Al lined mine the whole way down in thetrain. I'm not even thinking about it. That's one of my talents. LikeI'm I'm very good at not thinking about what I'm doing. You know, I mean the consequences. I don't spend too much time dwelling on theconsequences, because you know otherwise you just wouldn't do anything. But you what'sfor you will need go by you. That's what my mom used to say. It's not like I'm not aware that there are consequences. Of course,something just I don't let them take me out the moment. Man. Lifehas its own momentum. I like to be in the moment. That's whyI'm a usession man. Just be told, I quite enjoy the JOMMY. Itwas on time and oven ages. Since I've been on a long trainjo on they like years. Still know what the money though. The carwas there right. They said. It was five minutes walk for Lame StreetStation, Slam Bang in the city center. Keys are an a magnetic box underthe wheelaunch. I get in the car, there's an address in theglove compartment to drive the car to. I want a street just off leafwalk. I know the street whale because I used to buy my weed fromthere when I still small. As a for digit number for a key lotbox outside the house, I have to memorize both the address and the codeand get rid of the bit of the paper. Actually, I don't dothat. I wrote the code on mom I'm really bad with numballs man,and I just be parting like the whole time that I'd forget it. SoI wrote on a mom where, a Sharpie, but like way up mysleeve above my elbow. Then drive back up the road. A little overfour hours. It takes me the whole time. I'm just calm like coolsIQ com by man. I don't even...

...think about what I'm doing. AnyoneI asks, I'm just in a favor for a friend and I recently thisceased dad three grand. Just focus on the three grand. When I getthat bag out of the boot, it's a large musical and Smith case.Nice touch. I think frank knows what he's doing. A part of thecar in the street and go to the flat. The keyboxes attached to thewall just above the door buzzer. I don't even have to check marm inthe end. I remember the code. No baller, the flats and thefast floor. Easy Peasy, I'm and now all I've got to do iswait. The flat is completely cleaned out, like no even a cheer in theplace when doesn't matter. Twenty minutes away and I hear the keys inthe lock. Then there's frank. Don't even know how he knew I wasback. It looks smaller somehow that I remembered. How the Frank here areyou? That's too chuppy. He's not my favorite uncle. You get it, I course. Man. Any problems? Not, man, everything is Dandy, Dandy. It means is an eyebrow like he hates the world.Dandy, fine, everything is fine, man. It checks a lock inthe case, doesn't open. It turns to me and says give me thephone. I do it then gives me an other identical phone and an envelopewith three thousan pounds on it. What's the new phone for? Ask Orif you know, on the answer next month. Problem with that, Alexander, and I stand there hold an envelope with three thousand pounds on it andI see no problem, frank, no problem at all. That was ninemonths ago. Named Times AF done that. We little variations here and there.It's not always love a pool. It's been bombing them a couple oftimes. My chest car thef never the same flight either. A definitely flyingthe say each timeing mum. It's always frank that picks up in the longestHaf we you don was like. I know I'm going to lie. Ilove it like I actually look forward to it. Now it's changed my life. I'm a man who's easily pleased. You see a roof over my head, my sex, my friends, some beer, talk and span. SoI need to make me happy. I don't need much. I like mylife. So I've not failed the need to go text with a cash n'tlike I've saved most of it. First Time my life I've got money spear, one big pot of Samade as. I bought a new sex it's apeach like Yannig is sour man Japanese make. Always wanted one. My planes gotup a notch on a bind. I see in it dead pleased withthe biggest differences with my anxie eighty man. I used to bordy all the timeabout making ends meet, paying rent even, but for the first timemy life I've got it under control. Like the only thing I can't wrapmy not around is this is all because of my dad. Isn't that akicking the boys? The old man finally came through for me. Would youbelieve? The show in a the middle of March, man, and I'mthanking my lucky stars for fun time, Frankie, because all of my gigsgo right up this boat. As soon as it's lockdown, things starts happeningin my whole life disappears and like forty eight hours, like pretty much thewhole summer season is canceled and Harmonica Getlos wore going place. He's too man. We just done a waiting fear over the SECC and pretty much get bookedup for the rest of the year. Off The back here on new lead, saying I had also got a shit together and managed to learn the harmonicawell enough that you could play in a couple of numbers. Being none bandname makes a bout more sense. We even had bootons for twenty and twentyone. Then there's virus. Shit goes tets and I think to myself,see, if it wasn't for us,...

Frankie, gig I'd be up shitcreep right now. I've never filled an attack to ton of my life.The government. Would they be given me an I'd have no income. Lastweek in March and I get the text through. I've been waiting on it. It's Newcastle I have to go to and I'm thinking you castle yet dadsI was about worried about that strap because it locked down. I don't knowif the police would be stopping people like but you castle, that's no distanceat all. I can have this wrapped up and four or five hours andit's a breeze. Man. Train takes ninety minutes and I'm in the carand on the way back up the road two hours after getting the text.The flat have to go to. It's pretty central and I'm there before it'sgetting dark. Then four hours later it's proper dark and I'm still in theflat. Something's up. Let's just never happened before. Frank has always beenthere pretty promptly, but I think it's just been held up, just likeall the others. That's flat strapped out, man, not a scrap of onthat shore. I'm pacing the rooms like I don't have my phone onme, so I can't occupy my time flicking through facebook. All have onme is the bottom phone, my tobacco and, of course, frank's case. I might leaving that confident about looking at the window in case someone seesme. I end up just lying in the middle of the floor and oneof the rooms lay out just beer on even floorboards under me. I'm smokingaway like a hostage man. I'm using a soap dish I found in thetoilet as an ash tree. I'm not normally a heavy smoker like but I'vemaybe done in like ten rollies already. She had bored them. All Icould do is wait. What else has that they do? Then at somepoint I fall asleep. I wake up because my back is aching. Mydays a sleeping and floors are all of our man, I can't deal withanymore. It's dawn, like actual dawn. This is beginning to get annoying.Man. Who Long can I be expected to be held up in anempty flat just waiting? Then I start to think maybe there's an issue,a problem. Maybe the flats been watched, maybe I've messed up along the waymany maybe that on in me. A tentatively look at it. Oneof the windows does nothing. Not a soul moving. In fact. I'mstruck by how peaceful eyes it's ages since I've been a weak at done,certainly for this end, and sober too. I've forgotten how beautiful it was,the velvety, a liquid light pouring over the sety, splashing off awindows. I could tear the buds, not pigeons, a lie, yes, pigeons, but other bods to like spirals and shit. It was Nice, man. I felt one with the sety. You ever had that?I know that sounds all happy like, but it's true. Man. Iget these moments every and again when your soul just feels, I don't know, notish. You just catch yourself up belonging to the woman and no one. It's somehow important, Disney matter. Man, I know what I'm talkingabout. Anyway, I'm standing by the window, small then I see thiscargo past and pull up along the street alone and I think maybe it's frank, it'll last, but it's not. A woman get so I lost,still on uniform mossages, finished a shift. The taxi pulls away and I seea walk across the road to a fly and look through our bag.She can't of fame which is looking for and has to set it down theground and rifle through it. She finally brings out our keys and she getssomething. She's trying to get any door, but she's old fingers and thumbs andshe drops them and I see you.

She gets annoyed. We ourself likeshe knews doing it pick them up. Instead of getting back up street away, she just stays there crouched like that, and I see I hunchedover ourself. Should US trembling, and I realize she must be crying.My I didn't expect to see that. I mean I was emotionally anyway,what with the lack of sleep, the Saar back and all the beauty ofthe dawn and all that. That's just a buitflawed me. You don't expectto see things like that, not on the corner of your eye like that, people being vulnerable. I wish I had seen that. Actually, itmade me sad. Could stop thinking about focus alle being a out. Okay, so frank's got to show up today. He's got to, I mean heknows where are the conditions I'm in. You can't expect me to stay hereand definitely, but then who knows? Man, I'm not crimeal, likeI keep telling you. I don't know what these guys expect. I'min my depths, like so far, this thing has been easy and I'mfeeling can over paid, to be honest, but maybe this is what you're gettingpaid for. Maybe one out of every ten times it's a shape mereand you just have to deal with are. I don't know because, like Ikeep telling you, I'm not a cram. No, man, tellyou what I do know. There's no ball crow and I need go soon. Also, not a scrap of food. There's a bottle of soy sauce andone in the cupboards, but like a teaspoonful left in the bottom.He that's it, man, that and a fish slice. No tea ofcoffee either, not that I could make one of the was because does notcare. I mean, how long am I expected to wait in these conditions? I do it, or what else can I do? Eventually had togo to the bog or something hordable was going to happen. I ended upusing junk mail to white mass. Whenever look at a Domino's pizza menu inthe same way again, man, most of it still waged in the youbend. I had to ram it run. There we are, low brush.It gets to lunch time, noon and still no saying a frank I'mso bored, man. Every minute seems like twenty. Every sound in theclose outside, I'm thinking this must be having no sure, let God,man, not a sign. I'm bored at my tets mass is numb fromsitting in the floor. I'm hungry, I'm tired, I've got a nicotineheadache because the amount of smoked. I just want to go home. Andthen I make myself remember, force myself to think three Grand Mane and nogigs for the foreseeable it's a good thing you've got going. Just don't screwit up now. Two PM. Still no sign and there's nothing moving outside, like hardly anyone walking up the street. Even everyone is unlockdown, aren't they? I'm also like ninety percent sure the house hasn't being watched. I'vebeen taking tons looking at every window in the place and I can't see anythingremotely suspicious. So where they held? Frank I mean, would I do? I'll give them to four and then I'm going to have to do somethinglike five pm. I gave him an x ray or man. Still nothere. I mean, this is ridiculous. Now I'm going to have to dosomething. Nip Out to the shop at the very least, as awe corner shop last street away. It's still say it's what he's man,but we'll do the trick. I mean I could be there and back inten so I can get some beery essentials. I need them. I can't beexpected delivelet this. I forced myself to think us through the consequences thatramifications. Like I say, I'm not good at this, but I've gotto use my head. I mean, can I leave the case in here? Should I take it with me or, as a guy, walk and runme a case more conspectuous. But what if someone breaks in and takesit and I'll think I've no get any cash on me? I would haveto use my bike card and if I use my car, then there's arecord of me being in the area and I'm pretty sure frank wouldn't want meto do that. I mean, I...

...could take cash out, but therewould be a record of that too. Also the nearest cash machines miles away, and who knows how many CCTV cameras I'd be caught on getting. Yeah, so I check it out at the shop. Idea all together. Whatelse can I do? I could phone someone in a bottle my phone,getting the drop some stuff off of me. Who They have phone? Know?Who Do? I don't who. I could explain this too and expectthem to respond in the way. It's going to help. Also, they'llbe too much explaining. Man, the whole thing would be ahead it andI don't really want to get anyone else involved with Frank I mean I'm finewith it all because I deliberately don't think about the consequences, but I can'tget anyone else involved. Then I realize that question is pointless in me becauseI don't have a single phone number in my head, like I don't evenknow my own. I don't form myself. Do so what they I do?Man, maybe I've missed something. Maybe there's more instructions in the caror any case something different from the Times before. Something I've missed. Ipulled the case over in front of me. I'm pretty sure it's the same caseI've collected since the beginning. If not, it's identical. It's it'sdark grail either, not real ether fake stuff where brass finishing about four footlong, to wide, handling alongside and one of the tops. You cancarry it both ways and a combination locked open it. It's reasonably heavy,but you can carry it with one arm comfortably as long as you swap fortight to time. There's no head and compartments or other instructions attached to Ican see. Then I got a thought. You see, the combination for thekey compartments on the door in the flats is always been the same allof the nine times previous I've done this, one thousand nine hundred and fifty four. As I think you this, all the heels in my neck standup in this electric shovel runs through me. What if a carefully on the numberson a new medical display? One Nine, five four. Then withmy thumbs I gently push the to release locks apart, the clasp spring open. A second hot nauseest pulse ten goes its way down from my head tomy toes. I set there waiting for a toy pass. I don't openit straight away. I set there on the floor cross legged, the unlockedcase in front of me full of every strange possibility. It's intense, man. It's one of those moments. I'm not sure how long I'm sat therebefore I finally working side, but it was a Waywik time went from beingthe only thing that Martl to being completely irrelevant. It was kind of transcendental, man, and knew the second opened everything would change one way or another. So it was important I thought to be present. Part of me waswaiting on frank to rescue me. Appeared at the door Boston and before Ihad the chance to know, save me from whatever future was in sight.He didn't know. He didn't know, and it got to the point thatI'd stalled for so long the present was getting bored waiting on me. Itook a deep breath, close my eyes and left the LID. I heardit fall back and hit the floor and oppen my eyes again and look down. I don't know what I expected to be inside, but had I thoughtabout it, the actual contents would have been pretty close to my guess.Man, where else was going to be in a case like this? Couldier? Let us belonging to a guy like Frank. It was never going tobe a trombone. was that. The bulk of the case was fullably neatlysell a fee rapp bundles of fifty pound notes. Like two thoughts are I'dnever seen this amount of money before in real life, so I'm not closeto how much it was. On the top was three large vacuumpact bags ofwheat, good quality. Week I used to buy a lot of week,so I called good store nods and pretty...

...much excellently estimating how much and howgood. Is a glance and I would written there are about forty five ouncesat least paid bag I sat. They are looking at it for a moment, then I close the case scrambled in Americal Lock, and try to absorbthe moment. I know food myself and I'm self isolating a flat with nomeans of contact in the outside world for an indeterminate length of time. Ihave no supplies and I'm babysitting a case holding a substantial amount at dodgy moneyand enough weak to make cold place in like a decent blind waiting and agangster. I don't know what to Tom up and the middle of a globalpandemic. I'll be honest, it's not the Easter weekend imagined. Man.If anything, knowing the contents of the case complicates things even more. I'mnever less comfortable to even on its or in the flat, and there's noway I'm going to be seen out publicly walking around with it. I'm alsoaware I'm going to have to eat. It's now almost six PM. I'vebeen here for almost twenty four hours and all I've had as water at thetap and I really degrade and Shiit. I'm getting angry at my powerlessness.I'm getting wound up and I got to roll myself and I'll cigarette from arapidly diminishing supply a tobacco and it says I'm doing that. I think Icould really go a joint right now. Like I said, I used tobe a store but I gave it up like six years ago after my paranoiaI got so bad I accuse an ex of working for the CIA. Sadthing is that's not even the reason we broke up. Also, it wasgetting the way of me playing man. I got religiously and a reggae andit was affecting my relationship with the rest of the band, so I stoppedstepped up my drinking. The compan se much more socially acceptable. However,knowing that we do this in the case and I can't leave, it's soI can think about it's not like I'm going to take a lot, justenough to make the time pass quicker. I mean, I'll tell Frank Adada, I'm not going to be dishonest about it. I'll tell me can takeit out of three grand. He's the one who's got me locked in here. I mean I might see that the case just appened like. I probablywon't leat on that. I want took the combination, but the rest it, I'll be straight with him. I was trying to protect him, butnot leaving the flat. I'll explain. I didn't want him to be compromised. They'll understand and I'm sure he won't begrudge me. I joints worth thegrass. How could he? I re enter the code back into the caselock and open that. I take out a Bagger weed and I close thecase again. I mean it looks like good stuff. Even through the plasticI can see tiny crystals at thhc gluinting through the foliage. I try togently tear open the bag. Gently won't cutter. I'll play a bit moreforced than a lot more, and all that happens is at the top ofthe bag stretch. He's a little I finally resort to biting off a cornerwith my teeth and a minute I do, I thick pungent funcus skunk kicks salesinto the room. Man, this is good stuff. I feel highalready. It's been a while since her rold a joint and I struggle withthe mechanics of it more than I thought I would. In the absence ofa grinder, I tried chopping up a little with the edge of the fishslice. After two attempts, to think, end up with looks like calcified usegone down. Who Cares? So I'm sharing that and it's smokable.Just a light it and inhale deeply. I hold in for as long asI can and on a slow breath out, I feel every muscle relax and sinkto the floor and my forehead expand through the ceiling. God have messedus. Tell me again, why did I stop doing this? Why haveI not been doing this? Every day, my joint making skills get incrementally betterthan more baked I get as that we'd kicks end. My subconscious rebootsthat old stone or muscle memory and all...

...of a sudden I am once againpossessed with the spirits of cheach and charm bell and Ted and the dude fromthe bag Larbowski. I am transformed back into the one time super stolener ofmy six years ago self, the guy who almost set his house on firetrying to get rid of the a Mi Five Mace. It been sent tobug my house, which, incidentally, was the straw that broke the camelsback in the reason we broke up the thought joint. I'm makers. Ifucking master up piece to the extent that I can actually bring myself to smokeit and like frame it and show it to my grandkids. So I rolla fourth. I deliberately make those good so I could smoke that one will. Looking at the third one and crying over how perfect is like actual tears, as weird as amazing. It's some point I waited out. It's thefirst time I really understand where the phrase whitey comes from. What harms asI start waitness appears around your outer vision and slowly creeps into the set uptill all you can see his way. That's what happened. I don't rememberanything after that until the shouting. I wait violently. Someone crashing down thestairs and there's a pounding on the door and shouting open or Putt that it'san emergency. I'm going to charge you panic man. I mean Shit likeit's a police got to be. The whole place is sticking high grade wheat. Man. It's like Friday night and Amsterdam or leaf. How could havebeen so stupid? They're going to come through that door, they're going tofind me. In that case, I'M gonna go at your present or Frank'sgoing to kill me. Come on, man, thank fast. I grabthe open park of weed that's line and top of the case and I runto the window, open it and toss five ounces of the finish smoke.CAVER hadn't at the Christ morning are and the process, little Brokili, isa cannabis shower over the floors. Its tumble out at the bat opened corner. I follow my knees and try to gather them up, then realize it'spointless in the time that I have and I shoved the case center the cornerof the room and I get out and close the door and I got thecatching and hiding a cardboard. I hear footsteps running down the colose stairs andthen nothing quiet. I'm not convinced. I Sasn't a trick and I stayin the cupboard until I'm utterly positive there's not anyone in the house. Ichecked the front door to still and its henches and then sneak up to intentatively look through this by home. There's nothing out the ordinary in the coastI can see. I go back into the room with the case and itthe windows still open. Any case is still there in the corner. Thethought cost to me that somebody may it cleaned in the window and stall thecontents of the case while I was hiding in the cupboard. I run overto you. Crunching sprigs are tumbled we'd under foot as I go. I'llopen it and check. Everything still there bar the one bag I through thewindow. I make my way back towards the window, hoping I'll be ableto see with a bag landing by slipping some of the weed in my legs, flip up and the land of my bike. It takes me a secondto realize I'm not hot, but I just lie there still. I realizeit's dawn again. I just lie there and let the violet turns down,but I'm on and light slipping through the window till it passes over my barearm and I feel it's warmth. I turned my head to the side towatch it move across the floor and they're directing my sightline. It's two thirdsof an unfinished joint for last night setting the soap dish, and I thinkwhy not? I've always found one of the effects of cannabis to be clarity. It puts things in prospective helps you understand how insignificant everything as decisions becomeeasier. After my thought jointing at all obvious, feeling insignificant enough to decidethat I was going to go to the shop. I now had cash,no need for Pasky record keeping car but...

...sheets. I went back in atthe case in liberated a hundred pounds. If Frank complained, I would explain. He would understand my ration. Now he would respect me for my resourcefulnessand positive decision making. The case would be fined here. I'd leave itin the cupboard. It was definitely worth the rest. I carefully left theflat, making doubly sure I'd locked the door behind me. I went downthe stairs, but before I got into the street, was hit by anotherwave of paranoire that I'd imagine double chatting locking the door and had to goback up to double check it doubly. I finally get it onto the streetand immediately check their trajectory, by which I had throw the weed out thewindow in case by somebody call it was still there. It wasn't. Ofcourse it wasn't. I've just have to be honest with Frank. I'll tellmy heart. I was protected his interests. I thought it was the police andI'll cover this. Course, so am I, and you'll understand it'snot always going to be textbook as it that's why he's paying me three grand. I'm doing him I favor the father. I walk from the flat, themore I think I'm being followed. I actually stop at one point,pretended time, I surely so I can take a sneaky look behind him.Man, there's no one there, no one I can see any mey.As I'm walking I can feel a cold sweating the back in my neck andby the time I get to the shop I realize I'm krying, of hyperventlyand I'm having a panic attack. Get a grap ally, you're just stolenmine. I'm about to go into the shop and I see one of thosebank things with money and it lining the doorway. I'll look around, it'sjust some kind a test a tramp. I pick it up and walk intothe shop. It seems empty except for a woman behind the counter. Thewoman is unbelievably fragile, looking like she's unreal she abads me of an abuse. Suckus animal. I don't mean that to be nasty, but for Isaying that's which she reminds me off through the fog of my fuckness. She'sold and about side and she's seen shit she wants to forget. Excuse me, this was lying in your doorway, announced far too loudly. I realizethis is a first time I've said anything to anyone for two days. Ohmy goodness, I forgot all of it that. Thanks son. Also forgood to you. Just put it on account that thank you. He didn'tsomeone react. To be in this way in my stone state is suddenly overwhelming. I think I'm awful. Good is this far, and for a certainI think I'm going to cry again. I suddenly want to tell this womanever all about frank, all about the case and the weed in the money, my dad, dad, what a whole metell corn cave chest, andtell me everything's going to be okay. But most of all, what Ireally all of a sudden need to have to do right now, it's sellme some gummy beers and prangles like right now at the sight of food,the Munch's have kept all the way in and I feel immediately hypoglimic. Ineed to eat something, man, let I'm going to pass out here andknow I need to get some food. Man announce unnecessarily to the poor oldsuckers Chimpanzee Lady, who looks on at me with some amusement as a randomand grab at the most strongly flavored and easily prepared the food. Also BuyTobacco, rolling papers and half a bottle of whisky from behind the counter.By the time I'm done, the talks fifty five pounds. She's in noway, I'm used, when I handle to fifty pound notes to pay forit all, as that's all you've got. Yes, I see like it's aquestion to fifty pound notes. You Mad at something? Yeah, no, I just have them. She stops putting my items in at the bagand looks at me. You're going out to clap tonight. No idea whatshe's talking about. For a saying, I think she's sexually proposition to me. No what. So I have a...

...girlfriend, a lie or good foryou, son. To be honest, I'm surprised. I was talking aboutclamping for the workers, the NHS staff. Eight o'clock. What so I shedoesn't work for the NHS. Who My girlfriend? She looks at melike she's trying to work out what's wrong with me. I'm behaving like thisis the first time I've had a conversation. Yes, don't done you. Ican smell off you. I'm sorry. Ask again. Don't be sorry,I don't care. Good old you may as well the world's Gone Mad. I'm only seeing because as a girl looking for some loves, and ifLance over there, number thirty two, I think you can give us someof your headed is spear good. I respond and explicably, she makes ashow a scrupulously checking both the fifty pound notes. She keeps looking at them, then looking back at me and I know she's wanting me. She knowsme, she knows something's going on. She's going to phone the police themand I'll leave. But then I give her the money back. When Icame in, she liked me. When I walked in, she said Iwas good. This is way too intense, man. I'm too stone for thislevel and at action. She keeps on looking across at me. Ilook down on at the count. I'll to avoid eye contact. My focuseson the front page of the end by evening news stand back at me.The headline reads local crime Lord Frank Mull Dyes of coronavirus and underneath as apicture of frank, my frank. I need the headline again. I tryto process it. Then I buy a copy. I'm back at the flatwith my short and my copy the paper and I read the article three times, four times, five times. I need to make sure I've got thisright. Frank was taken into hospital and died yesterday evening, apparently underlying healthissues, but a factor also. I can't imagine people are falling over themselvesto resuscitatem. So what, how with am I know I'm self isolating aflat with no means of contact in the outside world for an endeterminate length oftime, and I'm babysitting a case holding a substantial amount and dodgy money andslightly less we than it was before. It's possible that no one knows I'mhere. It's possible no one's coming to get me. So what am Igoing to do? Then it hits me. This is one of those moments,one of those moments that defines you. Where the Calmera of the universe raceon your show. Those I feel like everything has been leading up tothis moment. Mom Dad, frank, I feel like the decision and nowmake will mark or somehow. Okay, it may be the weak taught,but this is a thing. I'm in the moment. Whether that happens now, a new future, of ways, who will I be? One of? Thanks for Shar Long. Whatever I do, I'm not a criminal.The chronologus is a watch this space production in partnership with guilted blood. Ifyou have enjoyed this recording, please consider making a donation. The details canbe found in the audio description, alternatively by visiting watch this space productionscom orguilded balloon DOTCO. Don't ut all donations will be split evenly between contributors,with a donation going towards the guilded balloon. Thank you. A frank proposal waswritten by Ker MC allister. Ali was played by Roscoe mcclelland gene wasplayed by George Sutherland. Original music composed and performed by DAP MAC, withspecial thanks to Alex Stephen, Richard Melbourne,...

Kevin Anderson, Katie and Karen Cordonand all it guilded Blin.

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