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The Coronalogues
The Coronalogues

Season 1, Episode 1 · 1 year ago

Chapter 1: Poor Wullie

ABOUT THIS EPISODE

Poor Wullie


A widower is surprised when the Corona lockdown brings an end to his own isolation.


Characters

Wullie played by Paul Sneddon

Jean voiced by JoJo Sutherland


Written by Keir McAllister

Music Composed and Performed by Dave Be Mac


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The COONA hox chapter, one wor, Walli I'll, be honest. I never dink Tis thingseriously to Begiv me. We do my demisers amittent to some would seeover ju find that I'm an old man, no shameannoyin it. I love the life. I got to expect anthing to be given to meanymore, no weer than bony anyway, no way to note bring a sval to my Feson, I'm too old greey and worn a good col seng of I grat to me anyway. WHAT THE WORLD DEEDS! I mean. Whe',surprised, mother, AF. Finally, putting her footdo the shit greatly so we'v Gongto boot things- I mean: That'sO missis it not we're made a beg. Messis, no surprise to anyone. Coronais Cama. That's that's what I think right. I can see that and I'm a seventyfive year, DOLG DECK SMOKER,...

I'm unthe new, Shlot, Bang, ded sig ofthe tanget demographic fine, come and get me I'll. Go Dong shredding because I'm aselffish man he's too old to be shined by it. That's PUTTER, furst Tok! When I readEvetaten, then Jian Bared me to the shop Ge. She runs the Gruciley storeWus, he disne runnik. She just does the on tings teld ne,nothing. She Starts Wich Sex and Il go, and just after that, get a be bit Timto get the shoters UPAN Den, am in there five minutes after that opens Ijust woint to get Anygo, I'm always up at the cat game in the morning urm andit Justtech me to go in ten werse people, usually none the last three years. I've been doingthat going that dame had to start shoping from a sal Y, seeafter he after the wife passed Dani make that Fece Gana care for your mork sympathy,pishes its noi, O piecewikes wt. My monage was ou witness, everhe he'R, nottherto. You a grief, my own. What was Ir talking about? Why gin wellshe's Abit ages, fe, me least. She looks it, but then she smokes thoughthimmanfulady and he can tell she's Hod ta life show she me just Bein Aotisfora, racket, she's, a sarcastic old bitch, which Iappreciate as that betker old man, myself, Mieri loves company, especially whenit's just as contankerous as me. Every morningi'll go an always. We havethe same conversation for the last...

...three years. Can you remember a singlemarming, but it's now going likethis Il walking the shop and she goes oh hs po,but she thinks she's really funny poor. Well, are you kid wait? Roy said she'scalling me poor rely because I come in an my own. Every day I get my sadlonlys shorping and my wifes deed. She thinkes that something iread thatPasu, like I said, she's a a sacastic co, but I't ater, a Anideven, your droopykid on Kenseadn I goin and she goes like. Ah, her ispurelle still alive. I see managing to cling onto lafe ed, you no, but seesomething like hats, an ongoing proteste but you're Weari, mid doomingthat fise yous your hack old bit, and then I get why ineeded take it tothe cantance she'd call that up to mes she was wregging it through shaming mewith the inshortbin one Mornand Role: Twenty P: OhDregatiata Glasi, one painte milk that'll do youtds Wuln't it son or poorvalley, one copy of Edinbrgh Evening News. You see even that for somethingto do in the afternoon, in between naps and wandering ar injur he's trying toremember where Yeu are Al, pear wellit and I woal stand thereand enjuhis abuse did my best Nothyo Ifhlay y, AH, and as I actually shate something likeate o me, a lengt China, Slat NA bayor bastard be carefulcrossing the road now yo te crap it old check and ibe shot back pesoff, Jin,yer ansird, all here and ther has...

...happened with only minor variations pbd.If I golize to three years most DAS was only conversation had with anybody. Apoor, welly routine, highlight of Madie that was UNTOL Nwell. When was in here ye idea. What Dni at must be threeweeks ago, I I three weeks goartige I went an sexual fivmasnotamobut is: Didthe Gen delivering our q lane ahhere h is Turd Valley still alive? Isee managing to cling on to lafe. Are you? Instead, the millet asked it andshe got all trusted and shaded what you doinge Rey come back to here. This wel I was fucking a Thinki. Yes, she talked to me like that. Hodiatyea, I gee, I have been self isolating for a years. Don't talk to me, BUR SELFIEETIN! So, Lo that you pesani me somebody a bat and Chaine and theywe've all got a walk ourselves in a bathroom and eat domp foot woul atPesto, non OL having it. I thought you ware smart enough not for for thatrubbish. Es! SHIPAD old man. Have you not seenwhat's bee happening in Atle? It's a good like candles at salvation army banpractice. Look at this tat are you you need to go home me, a stipid man. Youcan't survive a strong breeze at the best of times. Lete Aloda Kella virusgo hom. Youre bad from he to this is over I'll drop range, your messages andleave them on the doorstep. When I got offshift stay in the house, you cancome out when get telt to come out. Bat Tell Tan get at Housson still there yeabout. If I see you at that, doot I'll tell you myself strip it on miserablebaster, Dat, yeah sure I came warm. What choice did I have and that's beenme...

Ey, almost three weeks now, n ther should have been wite of a duckback. I me three weeks in Hes May Boyther, I'm very happy in Min company sure now Youd stat wait that about men.She said what she used to see. I never seemed bluwlay on my own, whichwas true, but then I had had butno to come back to you, I mean the thingaboout being alonelys is snoping on your own. It's the problem, it's the I,the nebd Kir a Yaa and she sure now she's. No, I don't care anymore Hanthat, as it toms out, is very lonely indeed Mi'm fining that Martan fine. I apfairis the way I wantit. I want her no being here to mean asmuch as when she was here. Otherwise, what is the point came hat I mean I'm seeing things arenever meant to see here streak to the story where I and where was it I so it should be Wan ofor thats back,but I didn'trealize that we need be the Ono one forcein to sell facolation. OhNo, you see. We live island in a din, ters flaht there's anupstairs frat thats recently been so to a young family. They only moved on aMonta show before they so started. A ques say they are the boy. Se boy must be me. Futy don't know Hooudies be is a MA. A young man he's Gota, be of like a homeless, privateand the tattoos on him. It's like somebody's going to ease arme a packet F, l, Tupsi and Shethe Wayour partnerb eveen...

...she's got dreadlocks and a nose roomoyhappi. I thik ALRIG identicate. If that's what theycall Themslas, I mean what the identify, as is that not what this innew igentify asI had bee, maybe they dol, but that's what they woot wait to me. No Stranger to the Wacky Backav e CamBat. I mean they they've got we boy and cue thin considerin is wear parenme. Hecan't even wole know oneor to Adon't. Why Ad Ge, CNTY, ageof children, B ut,you can speak and Walk Wen. Now very well. They'Leven upstairs they've beenthere a bit on Ma, ligasy and usually its fine, because we thereo te Ma theboth Wak God nusor is, I don't imagine the lawyer Lach piter away and tbe AdeWo, Muscia Nosteri or some onabigustes Grand Pirsa Idenican. I've never spoketo them in the whole time, thayve been here anyway. Usually there mush to theday, which should be because when the loy, when they're in O, good God noise,you Wulne to wive the bloody noise at comes through that Soan and, of course,that not NOTU, no fust cras ads. What was the first thing they did fromthe Fush Mod Tan. You e Dono Gis that the fist Nedid that, when the moved anAtfro was take up all the card. TATS get them Awat, O sor petof themselves,towere, for it do how cot you them talking Aso. You can hear everythingthat goes on in ar rat. I have them talking. Abot, Oh, who amazing it lookswith the natural forboard nowe exposed. A YECAWA is also exposed, my ear drumto your drug Mi Mush blood on banging a...

...bird. What does Ou God? People have againstCartet CSDS. I shoul o loved a good carpet. We spentmany a happy Sunday in a carpet wer hose ID onwa, se Wa, Bat Shag, showd up and Ylik. She hat me on the arm andthen laughig anme bathroom still Gok upit. I nol that'sunfashionable UN hi, J Niger comtly, I be sure wn owait to carpet- and I was don befor- was getting Ti. IVER after Shet gonehit, gets your feet, one. It insulates the itent. It MUF was a Sond of TAT,stumping our boat every bear. It's like this. A bloody bombavmenthappening ever evening. The Kid Ranin oupan doing the exposed woodenfoorboards waiting for. I can only assume our metal cloaks about youndrums do no so at nape, when they came homer, I was Bitt Inde ear plugs wy got a couple of years. I mean, canyou Gehav the bloody things? Ordi go I mean as well be Difi have to put upwith it. Anyou do it now? What choice have I go? Ohdayon, dump dumb thumbthumb dumb, nohes, noe fot, we eit. No, it's no hes stuck it Sav the whole tameon account of the isolation. They've no got a garden. You see the backgand tatmain originally a front GARDENA couple ofslabs of concrete and some gravel, but sh lo garden, see the back gardens manimis very muchsureness. I never took any interesting gardening and she didn't want me to Imean I got the grass occasionally but southe actual gardening. That was strictly Hord Domean and I isgreat happy to Wat. I got on Ye...

Gong to mackanroon. Now, though, hasn'tI, I cant E BE AP to be in it D inothen with it, not that no, we have to startsor. I just make it go, but it struck me. Maybe the boy youknow being stuck in, he rel, like the spece and anyway would mean he was'teGivn me Abe Green orade running through a after adiculous carpetless, whosimiat was my man: Mordivision Thats Wa, not pete, no, a random man of kindness oranything of the Kine W AINO decision from my ord benefiting so I ot a not alo upstairs couble. Even though thebackgarden is technically exclusively man, I have no ineed for it and youhave to be man. Therefore, please feel free to use it whenever, like I have noCao no did for it signed. Well, I doin this tar. Then I went and ipited through theliker box, twenty minutes later thereall and thegarden. Ah, three of them Te Buddy, chickefit, tenty minutes, Woano shine coming forward or it chicky bloody happies, a Barly, a Tane tey getback a news in a cousette dawns on me, Ohkay, sothe thump Tump Tump cump thump...

Ma a momentarily stopked that iadneconsidered T it. When I sit in MO living them. I'm looking right. The BadGarden Y sorfast pointed that partior doors to open te really or the Gardnersals an no suld'n. We are paper trying to know look at these bloody hippieshaving the own family wouth stock. In my shoe an this garden, I was sitting there Ge Taiman new, aLok, but I did teno hey and the woman Ol. She sees me yeah. She sees melooking and she shiks to Theeboy, and I can see you pointe, O Tim, Hey. The Weelady looks right at me: Nd e guest N, this big stupid smailer. I can see amountain. Thank you. An tenhe blush me a CASS TU lady, so I shok he curtins. I slept in thenext morning. I never did that. I walked to the sound of my letter boxgoing an h ie to the front donme. I mal never comes thor earle. Now I've gotseveral very launch: piss off notices on my front door, warning junk. Mailorsknow a brother, the RART, so rush to the door, O catch a globs at the BuganTin, tefor spece. If for Peope folded over and Nima goodesst Tas a Thoug, I picked it up like it was a ransomnorden, a slowway opened it. I'm looking at Wat can leasly be discribedas a drawing done in Clalin. It's nothing that actually loose likeanything. is s rubbish picture even for a two year old, then on one sid writtenvery neatly in blue felt pen was this message? Dear Nice, man downstairs that gets an idiot nice man. This is a picture of me and mummy andDadby in the garden playing hiden sheep.

Thank you very much for letting me useit. You are very, very kind, love Felix, kiss, Kiss Felic, H, blotdy Felix. Is She a Boad fillin on the bag? Whas a funor note here there we've been ginning to comedown as see Holmo. So sorry we haven't introduced ourselves. Thank you so muchfor getting us the use of your garden. You have no aidea what this means to usin these difficult times. If there's anything ot all we can do for you orplease don't hesitate to Ash Weth all got to look out for one another. Ihaven't there again, thank you so so much you very nice man, indeed Haron Anmad, very nice man, these people, arter idiots and, of course, the Willas fan on even it hase to b the first easterin yearswhen I hasn't e snowed and every bi past dons bein locked an doors. I've always said Scotland has weatherout is spate. We you see they're very sick. An thisvirus is over o pesh ton like never before, but fi. Now the suns it and upstairsthey're in the garden again e said the Lo. Just in the garden on othe good tools speeds, Rek, trowls,...

...even hell do the GIRLA. That's fat. Hhas gon mantosan and Nay Garden Ha ther atdoors on me. I bet you he's aGod. Noers me anobody explained the van he's Gota Wait, man beg Muckel, tiny,Punkh, riht and Yo said my front. Wendy sat cany, see up the street es AP body, hippy Godner, O bet, yeahMil Yin cread. That's Hel gets a Bewe lookan writ a trump all right. Oh myGod. No weca goot Wi Shaten Ivedy Kis, but it's still a lit, but is it Noomean?Is it just me? Am I being overwayh bloody, Changeit TeHony? I said they could use the Gud nebodysaid any of Hem te be din. ANOTHIN TN I coul Adidn't my goivness. To Way Iwanted it. They think they are. I didn't even close a govenismant. Ijust stand there. Ave watch them every now and again, tat look up and sway andde we've, like the quick idots Thet Ar absoluteven the bin He's having ae onDvia the ca Lok he's never seen a speed before even o r n't, just one of those prasticjobs. You get me a bucket lake when you're this e Sa and he's diginna, be I mean, he'sachieving Buger all. If enothing is Makin a wash nes of IT DUA it Tait,okay, happy or win. You culdyou hope to seethey all look. gloody happy did ye now kindes a pandenical idiot, leaning my view, my rottengovermn, an the next few days, heyv in that garden, Morn than noon and night.

Even when the MOM teacs the be went tobed the Pirate Dad Mat, oh whatever, he calls himself Wel hes still out there.Gardening away I'll, see this for them. Don Lo Lazy, I fout happis Fo Lazy Bull, I'm tellingyou you, but hartly recognize the place he's putting of Flo beds a vegetableparches. We did the lawn of boxes from Bob Shonower love that I mean I'm Knowwin, he gardens Bu. Eventhat can see thave done a nowthy good job feel ictualy. Theefello he's loving tat. You know I saw the other de Sqreener,we delate a sqitrl jump, the fence at the back of thegarden and the real ade saw it squealed. It ednne started running ton, totalingtowarnds it of course it Seit Gosi it. He fell. Thelamthihimself and I was almost OK. The Party of a doerbefore I saw his dad had seen him and he was running towards him. He mustfine doces GM sella be feight, stupid. Squittel that dide me an idea. Lo, no, it's been a RANSINC. I've had anidea, and I wish is Sou a what you do you I consed the Dignoien and then Ithought o no like I've got anything on. So I gotme coat and before then Yow at my Sall. I was at the front door and it was dontegen shop. She was serving Ta Crustomman asabarged in a pretty young LASSI. Both of them got hell of a freight is tatbell through the door. Hey, have you go an Y cokadis, you Oyou're bad I've,told Youyol KANAKAZIMINIAC EXAA mease your all coo. What kind of emergencyhhave you done to yourself? What do you...

...need to cook it up for? Have you had astroke? Come yes, sil tha non, no Mi! I Ma Ne, I'm fing your fine! You finearea! Oh now, I know there's something the matter: I've Lost Conto the amountof times folks asked you how you are and never once have ou ar Jou seefighting so ente you fimaly gone tourthlay, Delale or Youve donesomething fucking send u stuff. Either we get back in your Bodis you're bat. Ineedn't Cook it ot that Chata Pina Ba you need rat. You DEFTYOL Bastat,you've been too long in your own manger. Ind and I went to Raitin the eye and Isaid wo Du Donme, a Tany Fae. U VD, I'm trying to da some no and the pool cameive been coming in here again I give me a tryng desent. She shook eur hisslowly like she was in shock. Ther you havete theajust letme, do a sleep, I'mnot Woni I'l Gi wit, you, the stinner. You tell me Wut a Sinom her so and yougot it Fokinat and I JANA bein up BA and she suddenly leganed our compusureBein up BA next at a jam and I cock it up. I think you might be mistaken usfor fucking. We, those your Madl Bam, take your penut butter and go home. We UN and as Te Short Dor Sprong, shotbehind me AD. You Sad genask in this stunne Roman. She was Servin. What didteacher Sey to me? It took me two hours to walk, to wit, Rusin Bargar, wisneyJohnson. The bus I mean, I thought about Atabe if, whenit passed, but theewas, there was nothing in the roots. Hardly passed in Whit. A time walked all the way up through the traincenter who place desetted is it was like a FHULN mife didn't want to be in...

...it felt word like it was trespassing inmy own city, Princess Tream is e guilty tin was deserted across the meadows. That was thebusiest part my jemny dog workers, jogers Mostroom, mainly UN. The waytoday, Gen Brudiness of Molmingside Ma Trus WIS busier the Bakuno said, domet a Ar Pat, I moved swift enough. A couple of people threwg me Fonny luksis AF disave he di Iwen back as if to see PIOFOR Maoin business. It took me areal to fad it, but theyhad one nby one Amin one, one lonway coconutfor an old mounly, coconut abought, it free quid for a coconut.Have you had the Lake Dono Care if you've ever tried to saw a cokon andhalf your bread knife Tok the best part of the evening, Goana nearly wosh thefinger? Stop. What I done no was. I was up not as early as usual on I cuentlelybeing late Com y bed, but I was nup before they were up upstairs Ocay't this, because this you an't hadany started to sound like it was about to come in and dop me yet I'e WenEttinup, my garden. For the first time in three years I waited the back fanceattachd tha to you, half coconut Ta et ther andside men with the peanut butter.I drunge the home and the DROPO etch of the Inin Freri flew a wire court. HangOP, whecshire attached t the fancs by wanding at Rin. The portion thenseturing it with thict black electrical Tib. I make Yo the ginning for diner,then I went back in the hoose and I watched through the party your doors inthe first half o at me, putting them up. I cunted fors pirows, Chekibe Gray,basters, Pol dhes Prass Kimbray over...

...the fance opoovary VERBAGINII, or the peanutbutter for wo the WEMALA charge to get his breadfish and come doing this Dar,but they just as I was thinking about nd Nepinate, the back to Talp them up.I hav them come and doing theupstairs and up the gravel at the Sade of thehose. He was Fustei the garden Filix. His mom was close by inthe. I WISCHATLA NOE CBE boy is his mom was stralking back to him, wit Likei, madsate. They hadn'te clocked it yet ord me ShiTAPPD, I tapped gently in the windy and the MOM Halen. She looked up and smiled,obviously I'll, be but surprised to see me stand in ther, I pointed to the backof the garden. She just get. wickines smiling confused, she's, a sweet girl, Bu she's, no, thebreatest, I prode it again more ugently and that's time she looks around in thedirection anm pointing at to see bat two, a half coconuts danglingprecuriously that as wer agree squirrel hunging off each ofhem attacking a lash.I, the peanut butter, fishinmediately lights up and she grabsthe Beln excitedly Bue Numberin, so keeks them a minute and then slowly hasthe expression. Buste. A huge smile is to big for these Beed Tas and he crapshis hands and Jop something down with the delight of ill like it Evenno andI'm standing there watching him and hes mom watching the dat squirrels Anda Iget. I can how long I'm standing there, but at one point I can', O Zo, no, myFocus Changeo O. No, I see the ghostly reflection of myself and the party withyour windy. Just for a second I catch my olde watstupid fish. We are massive claking, an...

...faster across it, the crotalogues as a watch the spaceproduction in partnership with Gilton Blyn. If you have enjoyed this acording,please consider making a Donasian the details can be faind in the audiodescription. Alternatively, by visiting watch the space productionscom orgilted within Doncot, or U Autenation Focusli evenly between go tributorswith intonation going towards the GIVERO. Thank you what he pa, byspetial Tansayou Mail,KITN CATECON and all I il.

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